Ask a Birder

Ask a Birder: What do you do when your partner complains that you spend too much time birding?

August 19, 2026 by Editor No Comments

We asked several of our writers the same questions. Here are the answers to the one above.

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I’ve found a really good way of birding early in the morning when we are on vacation. I sneak out at sunrise and meet the rest of the family at breakfast (Peter Hinow).

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My wife knew I was a birdwatcher before she married me, so she doesn’t complain too often (David Tomlinson)

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Go birding (Peter Penning).

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Something like this has never happened. My current wife met me when I was working as a birdwatching guide and tour operator. So, it was a case of “what you see is what you get”(Rolf Nessing).

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Being the only birding member of the family, I take it in stride and sneak in „secret birding“ – luring them to birdy areas, claiming I want to see a specific touristy attraction there (Jochen Roeder).

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Now this is a tough one… I do try and honour any commitments, and I do try to be a better person and do household chores to earn my passes out. It’s often tough when the mega alert goes off (John Hague).

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I listen carefully, agree that she has a point, and then casually mention the birding trip I am planning for next month. No, seriously, she is the one who plans our birding trips and suggests places we should go next (Fitzroy Rampersand).

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My partner does not complain about this hobby but refuses to join.  Or so he says.  Over time I have noticed that he takes great pride in spotting the bird before I do.  No binoculars, however, will ever go around his neck (Mary Alice Hayward).

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I’m fortunate; my husband enjoys birding and hiking too. On the days I head out for a longer birding adventure, he usually has a golf tee time waiting (Kelly Isley).

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In our case, our fondness for birds has been at the heart of some very collaborative artistic moments, like creating a bird haiku together while waking up (or moments after waking up). On a more general note, however, we think the importance of balancing quality time together with each person also tending to their own interests is a worthy discussion to be had proactively in a relationship. (Rhea Alaudra).

Photo: Common Tern, Chongming Dongtan, July 2026